Hey friend, I know the feeling of being hurt by being vulnerable too, and I know this won’t change any of it, but I’m so sorry for all the ways you have been hurt.

I wholeheartedly believe that you didn’t deserve any of it, and that you are incredibly lovable.

I’d love to connect you with someone older and wiser than I, who could talk through these matters with you. If you’d be interested, please email us at: becomingfa@gmail.com

Thanks for your comment Not Convinced. I empathize with what you’re saying as we all carry emotional baggage around. I think you are actually very aware of the benefits of vulnerability as your comment was exactly that: open, honest, and vulnerable. Furthermore, you are absolutely right – it is to whom we reveal ourselves that we have to be careful. If a person has consistently shown us not to trust them because of their responses to us then we are naturally going to put up walls.

However, there is hope and healing in Jesus Christ. He who offered Himself on our behalf desires us to be whole in Him. True freedom is found in Christianity, in a pursuit towards union with our Creator. He is love – in His presence is fullness of joy.

I don’t know who you are or what your story is, and I know one comment can’t speak to the depth of your struggle, but I hope it at least leaves you encouraged to know this one thing: that God desires you.

Oh sandra I love how you mention the fact that Christ has made us his friends . Throughout my life I noticed that people who find it hard to confides to close trusted friends are the ones who suffer the most . Keeping our emotions concealed puts too much pressure on ones self .
And the bible itself mentions how that through many counsellors we succeed .
So I totally agree with you
The trick is to make sure the whoever we confide to loves us genuinely with no hidden motives . They also gotta connected to Christ so that whatever advice or input we get back would be up to our Christian orthodox values .
It’s so healthy to talk . To let it all out to free ourselves from all the fears and feelings that hinder our spiritual and psychological growth .
We should also be very cautious who we talk to . Accountability to a spiritual mentor ( father of confession ) is also of paramount importance .
And finally it’s the peace of Christ through the grace of his holy spirit that calms down the storms in our hearts and minds .
God bless you

“God Himself made us friends instead of servants…He gave us a pattern of friendship to follow. We are to fulfill the wish of a friend, to unfold to Him our secrets that we hold in our own hearts, and our not to disregard his confidences. Let us show him our heart, and he will open his to us…a friend, then, if he is a true one, hides nothing. He pours forth his soul as the Lord Jesus poured forth the mysteries of His Father.” St. Ambrose

Hey, thanks for the comment! This post does not discount the need for a spiritual father, but instead emphasises that as fellow members of Christ’s body we should be willing to share in one another’s burdens. We need to be vulnerable with and accountable to one another in order to foster authentic friendships and love within each of our communities. With this being said, of course this requires a great deal of discernment as we should not tell just anyone our most personal struggles. And of course repentance and confession are indispensable salvivic tools God has given to us.. but so is authentic friendship (James 5:16). Both are essential. Both are irreplaceable. One is not more important than the other.